Tolerance Pays

(Published in Banking Services Chronicle July 2005)

TS Eliot was right: Humankind cannot bear too much of reality. When things go wrong—and we perceive that most often they do—we get irritated. Paradoxically enough, the more comforts make their way into the civilisation, the more we get irritated.
Today, thanks to readily available loans, cars have become commonplace. But if cars increase, can traffic jams be far behind? And then comes road rage—a manifestation of our irritation.

The tolerance level has gone so low that divorce may take place over something as mundane as biryani. You think I’m joking? No, it’s a true story. Riazuddin married Pannu of Pilibhit. A few hours after marriage, he divorced his wife. Reason: he was not served biryani for dinner. Pannu’s parents pleaded with him and offered him other dishes. But Riazuddin was not one to be placated.

Cultural intolerance has become de rigeur. Artistes often have to face the wrath of the fundamentalists when they dare to think out of the box. Muslims feel “Islam is in danger” on the slightest pretexts. Hindus sue a Canadian brewery for depicting Ganesha drinking beer. Christ preached: “Forgive them for they know not what they do.” But Christians take cudgels against Vinod Pande for his Sins, a sleazy film about a sexually prolific priest. And the Sikhs care two hoots about the destruction unleashed when they try to blow away theatres in the name of Jo Bole So Nihaal.

Politicians cannot tolerate their being out of power. It was sheer desperation that led a leader of the calibre of Mrs Indira Gandhi to declare Emergency. However, it should not come as a wonder in a country that craves for power. As a trainee officer beautifully put it: “In our country, there is greater honour in society for the collector who declares a bridge open than for the engineer who built that bridge.”

Yet I maintain that tolerance is a great virtue. If you do not get irritated, it is a sign that you have become mature. And if you have your goal in mind, you are much more likely to succeed than an intolerant person. Don’t think that Mrs Gandhi became successful because of her intolerance; it was in spite of this vice.

In fact, in most of the cases, ripeness and tolerance go hand in hand. Confidence breeds tolerance and vice versa. It was at the peak of Sikh militancy that Sunil Dutt went on his Sadbhavana Yatra from Mumbai to Amritsar in 1987. And yet he was positive: “You watch, they will drop their guns and embrace me. I am going to the Golden Temple to pray for their well-being.”

It pays if you don’t get irritated. The two greats of tennis, Bjorn Borg and Pete Sampras, have been known for their iceberg-like coolness. They were so patient that even if they went down by two sets and five games, it did not matter. They believed in what the Gita preaches: focus on your action and the result will take care of itself. More often than not, they emerged victorious.

Or, take the case of an actor who is good at his job but lacks the charisma that has become a prerequisite for becoming a Bollywood star. Should he get irritated at a biased society and resign? No, because perseverance pays. There is the example of Sachin Khedekar before us. After continuing for long in a relative oblivion, he got his due in Freaky Chakra. And now he has become a star in his own right with Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose: The Forgotten Hero.

There is no need therefore to get irritated even if success eludes you. There is no harm even in admitting one’s weak points with grace. The only caution: tolerance or patience should not become complacency. At the end of the day the winner is the one who has made best efforts.